From: drakkar@bconnex.net (Charleyne Hall)
Newsgroups: alt.tv.x-files.creative
Subject: NEW: Mixed Match II by Charleyne Hall
Date: Sun, 17 Mar 1996 19:04:30 GMT


*Disclaimers:  Dana Scully, Walter Skinner and Fox Mulder
all belong to Chris Carter (the God of television), 1013
Productions and Fox Broadcasting.  No serious infringements
intended.

*Author's notes:  This one does NOT follow character.  Just
as Mixed Match didn't, so don't be looking for the characters
to actually be "in" character. 

T h e  X - F i l e s
Mixed Match II - Conflictions of the Heart
By Charleyne Hall
(drakkar@bconnex.net)

-----


        Mulder remained silent for a long time.  The news had
a leadening effect on his heart.  He tried to swallow but his
mouth and throat were so dry that he couldn't even think. 
Scully had revealed to him something he had never, ever
hoped to hear.  He had heard the rumor mill turning about
Scully and Skinner but he had refused to believe them.  Until
now.  He was utterly speechless.

        "Mulder?" Scully asked in a soft tone that only
succeeded in making his mood darken further.  He did not
answer, evoking another soft call of his name.

        "Uh-huh?" he managed, studying his fingernails to keep
from having to look at her.  It would hurt far to much if she
made him look at her.  Especially now that he realized the
feelings that had been cowering on the edge of his
consciousness for almost three years now.  He was utterly and
completely in love with Dana Scully.

        "Mulder, please tell me you're not upset." she said,
softly, as though she really cared how he felt.  Mulder wasn't
sure if she cared about him anymore.  He wasn't sure of
anything, except the rising heat of the office.  Mulder tried to
swallow once more.  He tried to find his voice but it had
abandoned him, along with any hope of ever making his
private fantasies of Scully come true.  Vanished, was a good
term for it.  He couldn't tell her he wasn't upset.  It would
just defeat him--make him admit that their platonic partnership
would be nothing more.

        "Sorry, Scully."  he said, pushing out his chair and
hastily standing.  He took his suit jacket from the back of the
chair and slung it easily over his shoulder.  "Gotta run."  He
ducked out the door, leaving Scully to stare after him.

-----

        Dana Scully didn't stare after him for long.  She shook
herself into motion and steadily followed after him, taking the
stairs two at a time in order to get to the main floor just as the
elevator did.  She needed to talk to him, find out why he
should be so upset over the fact that she and Skinner were
seeing each other.  
        
        She found herself hoping that Mulder wouldn't do
anything stupid like confirm the rumor and get both she and
Skinner into trouble.  But this was Mulder she was thinking
about.  He wouldn't do anything so low, would he?  She
couldn't be so sure, now.  She couldn't get the look, that had
been painfully etched across his face as she related the events,
out of her head.  
        
        Something about the look had stirred a feeling deep in
her stomach.  A feeling that she didn't like and scared her
even more than the threat of Mulder spreading the truth.  

        The truth?  What was the truth?  Scully couldn't find it
within herself to admit that she had once had feelings for
Mulder.  Feelings that she had never expected to surface
again.  These feelings, however, were pushing themselves to
the surface, screaming for attention.  

        Scully broke through the doors of the stairwell just as
Mulder was walking through the metal detector.  She raced
towards him, dodging several agents in the process.  She
caught up to him, gasping for air, in the middle of the lobby,
just atop the FBI emblem.  She reached out and grabbed his
arm.

        Mulder turned to her, abruptly.  He looked at her hand
on his arm, then at her face.  He yanked his arm free, in the
most violent gesture she'd ever seen him commit. Her mouth
fell open as she recognized the raw anguish that crossed his
face.  

        Just as Mulder had realized minutes earlier, Dana Scully
knew that Fox Mulder was in love with her. That revelation
turned her heart to stone.  It sank in the dark waters of her
emotions.  

        As she stared into his eyes, those dreamy and brilliantly
hazel eyes that shone with pure and unmasked emotion, she
realized what a fool she'd been.

        "Scully,"  he began, his voice harsh and cold. "I'll call
you if I ever feel the need for intellectual intercourse."  he
continued, stepping away from her and turning on his heel to
walk away.

        "Mulder, wait!"  she cried, ignoring the painful
comment and taking a step toward him. She caught his arm
again.  This time, instead of sharing his emotions through his
eyes, he turned, staring at her, chillingly.  She bit back tears.  It
was now or never, even as she realized that she'd attracted the
attention of a few other agents.  

        Out of the corner of her eye she spotted the assistant
director and lost all control of herself.  She released Mulder's
arm and watched as he left the building.  She bit her bottom
lip and pushed past a few agents, heading for the nearest exit
that Mulder hadn't used.  She needed air.

-----

        Dana Scully sat on the park bench, staring up at the
stars.  She'd been sitting there most of the afternoon and well
past dusk.  She needed to think and the park bench on the
Potomac was the only place she could think of that would
allow her to clear her mind of all but one matter.

        She felt a pair of hands grip her shoulders and all of her
muscles instinctively tightened, ripping her out of her reverie. 
She was determined not to gasp, but a small one escaped her
lips anyway.

        "Relax, Dana."  Walter Skinner said, brushing his lips
across her ear slightly as he leaned forward.  He let go of her
shoulders and walked around to sit next to her on the bench.

        "Walter."  Scully said, blandly.  She didn't feel much
like talking to him, knowing that she hadn't quite sorted out
everything that she wanted to say yet.  

        "I saw you and Mulder this afternoon.  Care to tell me
what's going on?" Skinner asked, taking her hand in his.  She
didn't pull away, but his warm fingers threaded in hers only
made her heart sink deeper into the blackness.

        "Walter, we have to talk about something."  she
whispered.  He nodded silently, as if he'd known that already. 
She turned to face him, tears brimming in her eyes and
glittering in the pale moonlight.

        "Well, Agent Scully, after some careful thinking, I've
come to give you some bad news..." he started, falling silent
after the phrase had left his mouth.  

        Scully raised a finger to his lips, shaking her head.
        
        "I think we both know where this is heading.  You and
I can't see each other any more, Walter.  You know it, I
know it..."  she paused, trailing her finger down his chin,
tilting his head so that he looked her in the eyes.

        "I know it..." he admitted softly.  "I also know that I
was wrong to get in the way of you and Mulder."  he stated.
        
        "Walter, I--"  she began but he held up a hand.
        
        "Dana, remember that I'll know when you're lying to
me.  Don't try and tell me that there's nothing between you
and Mulder.  The spark's there, I can see it.  There never was
a spark for us, Scully.  I realized that today as I watched how
anguished you looked as Mulder walked out the door.
        "Ours was a relationship of convenience.  A
relationship because we'd both needed someone for so long.  I
came here in hopes of parting on good terms. I don't want to
risk losing your friendship for anything.  Will you accept that
we don't belong together?"  Walter's eyes were dancing now
too, so full of love for her that she could see his heart
breaking in them.

        Instead of saying the words, Scully leaned forward and
gave him one last kiss.  It was not the kiss of lovers--it was
the kiss of fleeting ignorance.  Scully had been dutifully freed
of her binds.  For that, she would always love Walter
Skinner.

        They parted with an eerie silence.  Skinner gave her
hand one last warm squeeze before disappearing into the dark
shadows of the night.  Dana watched his form retreating,
feeling the soft tingle of his kiss on her lips.

        After a few more moments of silence and dreaming,
Scully had finally decided what she was going to do.  She
removed her cellular phone from her pocket and dialed the
number without thinking.

        She waited to hear his voice before allowing herself a
smile.

        "Mulder," she said.  "Feel like some intellectual
intercourse?"

-----

End 1/1
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